Goodbye, Scale. Hello, life.
One year ago, on March 27, 2020, I smashed my scale. Actually, I smashed my TWO scales. You see, I had a spare scale I hid in my closet, "just in case" my primary scale broke. This year, on March 27, 2021, I celebrated being one-year scale free. Yes - my attachment with the scale was that strong. Deep in the eating disorder, the scale became my thermometer . I checked daily, even twice or three times a day. In the morning, I checked before breakfast. If it was higher than yesterday, my brain ran through the previous day. What had I eaten wrong? Did I not exercise enough? How would I compensate for this today? Which meal could I skip today? If it was lower than the previous day, there was a brief moment where I could breathe. But only until the instantaneous thoughts began: "great job!". But this was not enough. I had to be 'extra good' today to ensure that TOMORROW'S WEIGHT was the same as today, or even better...lower. This cycle brought me to a poin