We've all been there before. We all have moments when we feel down and think or do things that we would not normally do. In my own personal experiences, I tend to think/do some of these things below. I thought I would put a top 10 list of some of these, as these actions and thoughts are neither therapeutic, nor are they helpful for our health and well-being.
FIVE THINGS YOU NEED TO STOP DOING TO BE HAPPY
1) Trying to be perfect and working yourself to craziness if you aren't.
Face it - no one is perfect. And while it is great to work hard to make goals, it is impossible to be excellent in all aspects of life. It is one thing to do your best, but it is quite a different thing to work excessively and not take breaks because you want to be 'perfect. Research shows that perfectionism leads to anxiety, depression, bad moods, and even a less healthy body. Instead or trying to be perfect, focus on the goals that you have, and see if they are reasonable. If not, make new ones. If they are reasonable, do not try to go overboard. Get the job done as best as you can - but then stop. Do not be extreme and work so hard that you are stressed, angry, sad, or anxious.
2) Trying to please others.
You can't. We are human, and that means we are hard to please. Trying to gain the approval of others is a daunting task. Note that I am not saying that you should not do your job. Nor am I saying that you should be rude and disrespect others. What I AM saying is that you need not pretend to be someone you are not, nor should you change the way you look or act simply to 'fit in'. You do not need to dress a certain way, like a sport, or even talk in some way just to get the approval of others. Why? People are never satisfied. Instead, gain the approval of YOURSELF. Learn to be happy with yourself and your accomplishments.
3) Thinking that if the worst thing can happen to you, it will.
Sure, you may be having a hard time. And yes, it doesn't look so great today. But really, how is thinking the worst going to help you? It won't. Don't waste your time trying to think of all the bad things that can make this day worse. Instead, try your hardest to think of something good in the day. Is this easy? No. But I guarantee that it will make you feel a lot better. Don't always pity yourself and think that you have the worst possible life - this isn't healthy and it likely isn't true. Everyone struggles and has their own worries, and you are not different. But that doesn't mean that life is \out to get you'. or that your life is all horrible and depressing. Take time to appreciate the small good things in your life - you will notice how manageable this makes even the hardest circumstances become. Every day might not be a good day, but there is good in every day.
Of course it is easier to forget about that assignment that is due in two weeks, than to start on it now. Or what about that file for work that you are supposed to read? Leaving things to the last minute, or procrastinating, is always the EASIER choice. But is it the smartest? No. Leaving things to the last minute makes us stressed, anxious, and angry. We become so overwhelmed with things to do because we haven't done them in time. Stop this endless cycle! Make a list of things that need to be done, and use a calendar to keep track od due dates. And start your work ahead of time - you will notice how relieved you are when the due date approaches. You will be less stressed, and you may even have time to relax! Learn to organize and prioritize.
5) Forgetting to be kind to yourself.
We get caught up in buying gifts for others, running favours for our friends, and answering calls. But do you take the time to relax and breathe? Time for YOU. This means not answering all those texts, thinking about work, or rushing to get things done. It means taking the time to breathe, listen to nice music, or even buying yourself something nice as a reward for all your hard work. Stop living life in a rush - remember, you only have one life to live. Do you want it to go by without even ENJOYING it? No! Dedicate some time each day or week to yourself. Go out and buy something nice, eat a nice meal, get a massage, or read a funny book. Don't get caught up with others and forget YOURSELF!
For me, the top one seems to be number 1. I often try to do so well in all aspects of life that I forget that I too am human and cannot achieve this! I work myself over and over, trying to finish all my assignments, blog, work, and being a perfect sister and daughter...and nurse! But, reality is, I cannot do this. I am now more aware of this, and I will try my best to remind myself that I cannot be perfect - and that is okay and even normal!
Which one do you fall into the most? Now, look back and read that number again. Think about how often you fall into this little habit: when does it happen? What are you feeling or what is occurring when you think or act this way? This will help you determine how to get over this, as well as how to put an end to it. Being aware of what you do or think when stressed can help you fix it!